Week 3 of The Bachelor - Tierra does a face plant into the stairs, Kacie screwed up in a major way, Lesley M. is probably going to win the whole thing, Lindsay is hot, and Amanda is still creepy.
Date #1: Lesley M.
Sean takes Lesley M. to the Guinness World Records on Hollywood Boulevard in hopes to beat the record for longest on-screen kiss, which they do by a few seconds. Having to watch this for over 3 minutes was awkward at best because I didn’t consider that a real kiss. They followed the rule which was that their lips could not come apart but that means they totally could have used tongue that entire time… which they did not do. They end their date atop the Roosevelt Hotel and naturally continue kissing. I think Lesley M. admitted that Sean makes her labia tingle. That could have been my imagination though.
Group Date:
The broads were divided into two beach volleyball teams and the winner got to spend the rest of the evening with Sean. Lindsay (purple bikini) might be the hottest chick ever. She could even admit that she’s an emetophile (someone who feels immense sexual pleasure from the witnessing the act or sound of puking. Said person may also become extremely turned on by puking, or being puked on) and Sean should STILL pick her. When they were making out later that night, Lindsay was biting Sean’s lip and wrapping her hands around his head and she was just so fucking into it. She could have puked in his mouth right then and there and Sean STILL should pick her. Passionate. Smokin hot. A keeper. And Lindsay gets the group date rose for obvious reasons.
Kacie’s “foot-in-mouth” moment happened when she felt it would be good to tell Sean there was drama taking place between Desiree and Amanda. The highlight of the conversation was when Sean said, “I want you to act like Kacie, not like this crazy person that I'm seeing.”
In between the dates, Tierra falls down the stairs and girls are questioning whether or not it was intentional. Sean sits with her on the couch and Tierra’s vagine is almost hanging out of her white shorts which makes it all worth it.
Date #2: AshLee
Six Flags Magic Mountain – Sean invites two dying chicks as some charitable shit or something. The chicks suffer from pain and fatigue which made me laugh out loud cause they’re at a fucking theme park. Sean and AshLee have to pretend like they give a shit for the rest of the date. Their day ends with a private concert by some band playing shitty country music. So I wasn’t an AshLee fan at first and don’t find her attractive at all but seeing Sean’s reaction (tears) to her story about her abusive childhood and her positive outlook, it may have changed my mind about her. The clincher was when she said to the camera, “I’ve already opened up to Sean more than I have with anyone in my life, and now my heart is in his hands, to hold and nurture and take care of, and for me to place that into his hands willingly… I never thought that would happen, but here I am.”
Before the rose ceremony:
Sean surprises Sarah the amputee by letting her visit with her dog. That was pretty bad ass. I did not like how Sean wouldn’t finish the conversation with Kacie B. Two girls came over to interrupt and he welcomed them with open arms. Kacie B. deserved more than that. Fortunately, before he handed out his first rose he pulled her to the side to personally explain how he felt. Unfortunately, it wasn’t in her favor.
Who’s left:
- AshLee F.
- Jackie, fuck-me eyes
- Selma
- Lesley H.
- Daniella,
- Catherine
- Robyn, the black chick
- Tierra
- Amanda, psycho
- Desiree
- Sarah, the amputee
- Lesley M.
- Lindsay, smoking hot
Sent Home
- Kacie B
- Kristy, Model
- Taryn, Health Club Manager
Oh and finally, Jackie has fuck-me eyes. She might just be hotter than Lindsay. I’d probably send everyone home except for these two although I still think Lesley M. (date 1) will still be there in the end. Fuck. Me. Eyes.
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